Lai Min

2009-11-25T14:05:00.001+08:00

I'm speechless.

2009-11-24T14:16:00.002+08:00

saturday frisbee was great, seriously, frisbee is fun!
and, i went lunch with f ytd at foodcourt, bbted and back home.

anyway, i had lunch with jane at ljs just now. :D
we walked around, went ntuc to buy some jelly powder!
i'm going her hse to make jelly next week! (:
she bought her bro's lunch, and we went back home.
btw, i'm going for singout later, can't wait!

hahah. things are just getting better and better. :D

sop 2s, i know it's tough, but pls don't give up.
i understand how your feel.
hang in there alright, your can do it! :D
believe in yourself, don't be discouraged.
jia you! :D
- your sl

2009-11-15T22:41:00.002+08:00

i didn't know what to do when i saw the posts.
i was sad, i was angry.
accept the fact?? no, i tried, but i can't.
i should cry?? i have already cried enough for this.
it's been so long already, but i just can't get over this.
why? just why can't i get over this?
it really hurts.

2009-11-14T13:41:00.002+08:00

today's my b'dae:D
happy birthday to myself.
thank you to all that wished me.
thank you doreen and yvonne for the redbag!

i totally love you guys ttm!
going for ultimate later, first time.
i can't wait!

2009-10-24T13:25:00.002+08:00

Happy birthday, junhui(:

the past few days was great.
i jogged with mingli at bishan active! :D
hahah. it was fun!

next week i'm going out with jane lisa and others, awesome(:
and next monday is cca day.
i'm having audition for choir on monday! scared!!
i hope i can sing the part i like, yeah!

going to cityhall later for my braces appointment at 4:50pm.

2009-10-19T18:44:00.002+08:00

tmr is lisa's birthday.
so we are going out to celebrate.
yeah, 3 cheers(:

2009-10-18T13:05:00.002+08:00

great! exams are over(:
had a great time with doreen, hazel and yvonne on friday at party world.
everyone was so crazy, esp doreen singing.
"sorry sorry" , " gee gee gee gee baby baby baby".
hahah! she's crazy over that song.
really had a great time with your! thanks girls:D

i am bored!!
LAIMIN IS VERY VERY VERY VERY BORED!

i am really very happy now,
and being happy is the most importantly thing(:
finally understand it now.
i don't care. just be happy:D

2009-10-10T12:51:00.002+08:00

i thought my left hand was okay..but it was not.
last week i already felt my left hand got something wrong.

today at piano, i couldn't play grade 7 pieces, teacher ask me don't play staccato.
i didn't play my favourite maiden's prayer and sweet bye and bye.
cause my left hand didn't have the strength to take these songs.

told my mum abt this ytd, and she said cause i drank too much bbt,
and didn't have enough sleep, which is like no link?!
she doesn't seems to believe what i said. whatever.

whatever itis, i am seeing a doctor later, and that's a comfirm.

2009-10-02T18:40:00.001+08:00

thanks friend..for that.
thanks a lot.

2009-09-19T21:10:00.002+08:00

i just realised that i created a lot of trouble for a lot of people.
i dropped the iron on the floor, sorry mother.
i made somone angry. sorry, didn't mean to. really.

anyway, ytd sop 2 made great improvements.
hooray! i was freaking happy ytd! hahah.
i bet the conductor thinks so too:D yay!
3 cheers, sop 2! (:

anyway, sorry friend.
didn't mean to tell on you.
it just slipped from my tongue.
really sorry. waiting for you to forgive me.

i haven't started studying for E.O.Y
should start later..hopefully:D

2009-09-09T19:36:00.002+08:00

today choir was great, or maybe it wasn't.
it was great because everybody enjoyed themselves, me too.
it wasn't great, because sometimes what the conductor say really
do affect me.

sop2 seniors, pls come regularly for choir.
today i almost freaked out,
only me and jia ning were there.
i have no idea how i am going to manage so many sec 1.
pls, do come regularly, alright?

someone just called me, and i really felt happy about the good news!
hahah. i don't know why, but i just felt so happy.
that's great.
tmrw will be a pleasant day because someone is coming back!!^^

hopefully, i am going to bugis with zena tmrw.
can't wait for tmrw, hope nothing will go wrong:D

2009-09-09T00:09:00.000+08:00

today sucks a big time!
i was wasting time today, didn't even do anyhw,
and i haven't start studying for E.O.Y.

there's choir tmrw.
doreen and rest were editing the songs, doing ppt slides.
i only editted few songs, didn't helped much.
sorry guys!

only till ytd, i realised how it felt to be rejected.
i finally understand how you feel, sorry.

2009-09-06T18:23:00.000+08:00

now,finally,i understood what actually happened.
and i even believed what you said.
i trusted you, because you are my bestfriend.
i gave in, beacuse you are my bestfriend.
i forgave, beacuse you are my bestfriend.
and yet, you do this kind of things to hurt me.

you know what, bestfriend.
you can have them all you want,
because they doesn't matter to me anymore.
you can continue with your lies infront of me,
acting kind and nice, while doing things behind my back.

i will not be angry with you,
but will continue to forgive you,
because you are my bestfriend.

it's enough.

2009-09-05T15:28:00.001+08:00

I am back from camp. yay(:

Day 1:
played seasaw,damn difficult to balance,
but my group, did their best:D
had raft building competition.
jetty jump is the best, hooray!
i jumped 4 times.
everytime with different people.
i jumped with twin, hui yee and zena.
when i jumped with zena,
we held hands, and both of us shouted
"YOU JUMP, I JUMP" then we jumped. hahah. great:D
indiana jones was fun(:
supposed to have night walk, but because it's raining,
night walk is cancelled.

Day2:
had trekking in the mountains.
when jh helped twin, he said: "bu kuieh shi track&feild de"
when jh helped me, he said:"bu kuieh shi zui blurr de"
i was like walao..you like that!! hahah. joking only lahs:D
when we had to climb with ropes, i hit the rocks, and i got giddy.
luckily twin pulled me, orelse i would fell.
reached mountian top, puiyee, xingtang, peishan, zee cooked for us.
thanks guys:D
when we went down halfway, my class, 3love, got LOST!!!
and jega's leg was seriously swollen, and everytime he walked, i bet it hurts.
and my class's insructor, shannon and za decided to trackback,
meaning U-turn.
when i came down, almost every step was slippery.
thanks guys for helping, love you guys:D
we decided to stop and rest, while ping wen and the other instructor came up
to rescue my class. we waited for 3 peace and 3 truth.
at that time, laura cried.
i was freaked out, my reaction was:"we are lost, we are lost!"
at that time, it was night, it was pitch dark, i couldn't see anything.
when i saw ping wen, instructor, 3peace ,3 truth,
it's like seeing hope, feeling more secure.
all of us got down the mountian, it was scary, the ground was slippery,
all of us finished drinking water, there was no water left.
but everyone persevered.
we reached the camp site about 1 plus i think.
everyone was tired.

Day3:
head back to singapore.
cried in the bus, cause i missed bishman too much.
ate with jane and zena, we had pepper lunch, bubbletea, then went back.
all the instructors were so niceee:D

after this camp, really understood my class better and bond alot with them:D
thank you everyone!
and that includes instructors, my classmate, my schoolmate, teachers:D
bishman, my goodfriend.
i miss you like shit.
you know what? ytd i wanted to call you to lunch together..
forgetting that you are not in signapore anymore. -.-

thank lord for protecting all of us throughout the camp.
esp during the trekking, thank lord for bringing us safely back
to singapore.

going to mughard for E.O.Y!
hahah. study hard, everyone:D

2009-08-22T16:50:00.000+08:00

exams are finally over:D
like hooray! time to take a break, yeah.
got back some of my papers and felt rather disappointed
for some subjects.
science(physics)-25.5/45
english-27/43
e-maths-42/60
a-maths-33/60(it was a miracle that i passed, i thought i would fail)
dnt-27/50(mr lim wrote on the paper "can do better")
lierature elec-16/25

so far this are the papers i got back.
remembering me crying in the middle of a-maths paper.:(
rather disappinted with physics from A2 drop to C5.

cheer up everyone, there's still E.O.Y. jia you:D
13 days till that gay is leaving.
it's going to be weird i guess, i believe hazel agrees with me.
hope he will do well in there,and not forget about me!
take care, my friend(:

two days ago, peishan and pui yee told me about tsung ting.
and they asked me if i rmbered her. my reaction was:
yes, of course, how can i forget our bestfriend!
hahah. i miss her. 4 years since i saw her.
that's really long. i wonder how she's doing in tai zhong..

later, i meeting jane and lisa at 6 for movie!
finally can go out with them. yay!
shall go bath now. bye(:

2009-07-24T21:38:00.003+08:00

this few days, i 've been in a really bad mood.
i still rmb last tuesday(21/7)(7.52pm) when i received a call from my grandma's neighbour: can you pls rush over now, ah-ma fainted and she is uncounscious!
my mother and i quickly rushed to my grandma's house. when we were in the taxi, i told the uncle to drive faster. i called my father, two aunts, brother and grandfather. i still rmb my mother and me crying on the taxi, praying everything will be alright.
at that time, my father was overseas and my brother was still in sp. my mother and i just felt so helpless and insecure without them.

when i reached there, i quickly banged through the door and went into the room to see my graandma. she was still uncounscious, and my mother cried even more because she thought that my grandma couldn't make it. i took out my phone and called 995. it's the first time i called a ambulance. because i panic, i gave the wrong address, luckily the ambulance people know.

as i waited for ambulance to arrive, i was shivering, with tears dripping from my face. i was worried that smthing bad might happen. when they came, they carried her and they gave me instructions of what to do and i followed.

do you know how it felt like seeing your loved ones lying in the hospital with needles on them? it was horrible. i bet it really hurts. at that time, i really wished that i was the one that would be lying in the hospital instead.

two days ago, my grandma was discharged. and i was realy relieved. thank lord for watching over her.
now, today morning my bro had fever 40.0 and he had a 1 week mc. it's really serious this time, cause he look really pale, he doesn't play com games now, he gets tired easily.

grandma discharged and now my brother sick. what is this?!
gosh, wish that everything will be fine.
dear lord, pls watch over both of them.

after this, i learnt to cherish my loved ones. esp my grandma. although she is bias to my bro, but yea, she's still my grandma. i still love her a lot.
grandma<3

you kwow what??
after all this had happened, i really don't have the time and mood to care about all this wishy and washy stuffs.
it's just...tiring me out.

god will give me the strength to carry on.

2009-07-24T21:22:00.001+08:00

wow, i just realised how long i have been neglecting my blog.anyway, today got interclass frisbee. my class got in second. great job guys(:

all i do, is to ask the question why to myself.
why? i am really sorry, ahem.
sorry for making you feel uncomfortable in class, even avoid me,really sorry about it. i guess it's because i "stalk" you too much or what.

everytime i see you, it just reminds me of the past, and that's what i really hate. the more i want to avoid your, the more i see both of your. it will only makes me hate you even more. i swear everytime i see your, i just can't control myself, but cry. why? why is this happening to me? this was not the life i wanted..

2009-07-04T23:57:00.002+08:00

not really in a good mood now.
thinking about what's been happening this week.
it practically suck.
and people asking why i so moody?
really sorry guys, i really can't help it.

i dont' know how to face you.

2009-06-27T20:08:00.002+08:00

ytd:
ytd was the last day of AEM course, like finally.
trained back to bishan with suen, felicia, jovi and friends.
a really thank you to jovi, moses, and jit fen for ytd.
esp jovi, i saw what you did! i am not jealous:D
hahah. we ate dinner at s-11.
no, everyone ate except me cause i no appetite.
then saw hazel and monkey.

then smthing happened.
i couldn't hold back my tears,
maybe it's because i over reacted with what i saw that really hurt me??
yea, at that time, i felt as though i can't breathe.
i couldn't stop crying..i couldn't control my emotions.
i embarrassed myself infront of felicia and moses they all.
esp infront of him, crying infront of him..:(
thanks for your concern people, really appreciate it.
then, i even did smthing that really hurt me,
to make THEM feel better.

well, ytd is really a bad day for me.
it's the worse day of my lfie.
that hurt is extreme that i can't even stop crying.
why? why? why did i have to see that?
i can't avoid it..i have to face it one day.

suen, what if i see them again next time?
i don't know what to do.
i don't know how will i react.
i don't know what will happen.
i am really afraid.

you, the thought of you brightens up my day.
it definitely will lift up my spirits.
just looking at you makes me feel better.

forget it. i really should stop thinking about it.
even if it happens again, there is nothing i can do.
i will leave everything into god's hands.

let me off, will you?

2009-06-16T21:31:00.002+08:00

for the sake of you, i almost lose a bestfriend.
a lot of people advised me to give up on you,
and i actually had the thought of giving up.
but now, i have decided not to.
because i can't do it.
not because of other things,
but because of a simple reason,
i still like you and i can't let go.

i am not going to give up.

2009-06-16T21:08:00.004+08:00

i really miss you a lot, bestfriend.

it's been like 3 weeks since we talk.

i promised to go out with you after ct1.

i even planned the days. i even saved 3 days for you, and yet...

i really miss going out with you, sms-ing you, talking to you,

bubbletea-ing, walking beside you..

i really hated myself for not treasuring you,

i even took you for granted.

how could i do that??

sometimes, i just felt so guilty.

you treat me so well..and yet i took you for granted.

even if you ignore me now,

i will not blame you,

cause it's my fault for not treasuring you first.

i am really sorry for not treasuring you, bestfriend.

i am really sorry for taking you for granted.

i miss you.

2009-06-05T16:19:00.002+08:00

today was tiring.
i had breakfast with doreen at mac.
then had choir from 9-11, and exco meeting untill12.40.
we are all discussing about the party for sec fours.

oh my gosh, i miss my sections's senoirs.
pei jia, cheryl , phoebe they all.
i miss standing beside them, laughing at jokes.
miss them:((((
anyway, now that i am SL for sop 2, i think i should really
try my best to help them.
now , i feel more commited to choir(:
that's how doreen and me felt.
sop 2 rocks.^^

i miss 2 faith too.
i really miss them like shit:(((((
what's with me....getting emotional??
hahah. i really don't know what's with me.

here's a post dedicated to hazel tan(: :
hey there, june 4th.
i hope you do not forget about that date.
cause if you do, i will be very sad.
awaiting for you to come back from aussie(:

不知道为什么，我的心里感到不安。
请你一定不要出事。
请你一定要好好保护自己。

我不会那么轻易就放弃的！
我一定会坚持到底！jiayou(:

2009-05-19T17:53:00.003+08:00

yay! mid year paper is finally over:D
finally can take a break.

2009-05-14T16:11:00.002+08:00

yea, finished english, chinese,
social studies, physics, a-maths.
hooray. but i flung my english paper...

i know that i made the right deicision,
because you need him more than me do.
but what more else you want me to do?
because of you, i already took up a lot of courage to ignroe him.
do you know it really hurt me?

suan zee, you have done your best.
jia you(:

2009-04-18T19:02:00.002+08:00

two more days to syf.
that's really kind of scary.
peijia is having fever and sophie is sick.
like omg lah, suddenly a lot of poeple sick.

i bet that monday i am going to cry.
why will i cry? because i am scared.
i can't overcome the fears in me.

two more days people, hang in there.
don't let your efforts go to drain.
your can do it!!
jia you(:

2009-04-10T22:39:00.002+08:00

my mummy damn random,
suddenly see the choir schedule on the table then scold me again.
you think i want to go home so late isit?
do i like have a choice to chose?
i told you that i wanted me table to be in my room,
so when your watch tv and stuff, i can concentrate,
then you go say what superstitious things...as usual.
it's bull shit.

brother, i know you look down on me because i take combined science.
but do you have to emphazise on the word combined?
is taking combined science shamfeful?
you are just too full of yourself.
you keep saying that i will fail every subject.
i am already trying very hard to cope
with choir, school work, studytime,piano.
do you know that i am freaking stressed up now?

mummy, i said i didn't want to have chinese tuition.
the reason is not because i am lazy,
it's because i need to find time to study.
do i have time to study? no.
do i have enough time to sleep? no.
do i have time to play piano? no.
do i have time to rest? no.
no no no no! not at all!
i am really very disappointed with you.
i am really very stressed up.
you don't even understand me,
then how the fuck can we communicate?
everytime we talk, we quarrel.

you don't understand how i feel, you don't understand me.
you only care about your beloved son.
when it comes to credit, it always belong to him,
te credit, praise, care and concern never belongs to me.
when it comes to fault, it always my fault.
why? why? why? why isit me and not him.
why?

i am not angry that i am always blamed,
i am not angry that you are bais to brother,
but just dissapointed that you would treat me like that.

brother's birthday is forever so 'celebrated'
my birthday..do they even rmb??

dahlia, a thank you for being my listening ear everytime.
i shouldn't even have talk to him...
i am just creating one more trouble for myself, and letting myself
get hurt again.
why? why can't i just shut my mouth and ignore him?
sooner or later, history is going to repeat itself.
sooner or later, i will cry again.

i can only watch things happen infront of me,
there is nothing i can do. it was meant to be.
i just feel so useless.

2009-04-10T21:03:00.002+08:00

today i spent my day with dahlia, my god-sister.
hahah. went to lucky plaza and then to far east plaza.
damn fun can! :D
i bought 2 rings(:
she bought 2 rings and 3 pairs for earrings.
we saw a lot of nice clothes!!!
nice time go buy!

the day wouldn't be meaningful without you today.
thank you dahlia!(:
go out again!!

2009-04-10T00:10:00.002+08:00

hello people(:
11 more days to choir syf.
jia you, don't give up(:

my a-maths and ss test today gone case alrdy.
i still got e-maths test. paper is easy(:
congragulations to my class girls for getting 3rd in soccer inter-class!
hahah. well done(:

today's upp sec assembly is very nice.
it's about this guy called joel...
he has no ears, no hands, no toes,
he didn't blamed the guy that landed him in this state.
instead, in this 19 years, he lived happily.
he didn't give up.
he forgave that person.
it's seriously very touching story.

you have totally changed to another person.
you are no longer the person i know...
sometimes i really regret saying things,
i wish i coud take the words back.
i know i can't.
there is nothing i can do.

and as for you, i don't need your fking care,
you can go to your....
i don't believe i can't survive without you.
i don't believe....

2009-04-04T13:44:00.003+08:00

hello people.
i am feeling much better now.
a really thank you to you guys for encouraging me.
i will be strong.

dahlia:
really thank you for being there for me.
staying back with me untill late,
being my listening ear, encouraging me.
you are my best sister(:

hazel:
really thank you for your letters.
its really did cheered me up.
yes, we are all in this tgt(:

i don't know why.
the moment you are with me,
i just felt that the same thing is going to happen again.
i tried to forget but i can't.

i ignored you because i am afraid that the same thing will happen again.
the most importantly, i am afraid that i will get hurt again.

3 love get in first for soccer interclass(:
yay. hooray.
well done(:

2009-03-28T19:42:00.002+08:00

i seriousy don't know what happen to me ytd.
after audition, i cried.
it's the worse audition ever..
i knew that's my worse song, so i practised hard.
i just felt that the audition was so unfair to me.
i shall not blame anyone here.
i just felt that my efforts has gone down the drain.

it's okay.
i will work even harder now(:

2009-03-22T19:17:00.002+08:00

i am pisssed now, but there's nothing i can do.
but just more and more scoldings from my mum.
i know you will forever side my bro, so i don't expect much from you.
yea, i know, my fault again right?
nomatter what i do, i just can't satisfact you right.
i already sacrifised myself silently, and yet you still blamed me.
this will perhaps last forever? hah..i guess so.

everytime you scold me, it just hurts in my hearts.
sometimes i just feel like giving up, i hope that i can don't care everything.
but i can't.
tmr is the beginning day for term 2.
i am scared. scared that something will happen.

sitting there is me alone.
the things you do is just too much.
i hate you. i don't want to see you.
you treat her like gold and treasure, you give your best for her.
but there was nothing for me.
i was waiting there, waiting for your attention, waiting for you.
so, what am i to you?
i am just a nobody to you, right?

since you don't care for me,
i don't see why i should care for you.
for the last time i say,
i am not jealous, bitch.
don't be arrogant that he treats you like gold.
i am not jealous.

it's really no big deal.
yea..no big deal..right.

2009-03-10T15:37:00.002+08:00

happy 16th birthday sophie(:

gosh. i am so bored to death.
ytd had fever at 39.6 .
so i only went for tuition half way.
the worse thing is that the fever didn't go down today.
stil at 39.6 .
my head was giddy and my mummy didn't allowed me to go to school.

i knew the reason why my fever was still there.
it is because ytd i went home without umbrella and walked in the rain.

ahh.. it's two days already and my fever didn't go down.
i don't know how long the fever will last.
but i know that the injection is making my arm numb and painful.
i only can use my right arm now.

i hate you. i hate you for the things that you have done.
i hate to see the sight of you.

i know you don't care about me anymore,
so i don't even bother talking to you.

2009-02-26T18:03:00.001+08:00

Happy birthday zena and yu teng!

2009-02-21T15:44:00.002+08:00

i was 25 mintues late for my piano lesson just now.
had scoldings from my teacher. really sorry.

i had no idea why did you have do that.
perhaps you are too friendly.
and that's why many people don't like you.

23 days more to my theory exam.
time is indeed running out.
i haven't finish doing 2006 and 2004 set.
bkry, i am not lying.
i am really indeed running out of time.
i am not joking.

i hate you, bitch.

2009-02-20T21:56:00.002+08:00

hello people(:
hahah. i passed a-maths test(: yay!
next week got attire check again. sian.
choir is getting more and more boring.

school is also getting more stressful.
hope that everything will be better everyday(:
i want to run 2.4km. hahah. anybody wants to join me?
hahah. i think no one will. they will think that i am crazy.

my dad going away for malaysia to work for one week.
omgosh. everyday need to eat outside food):
anyway. i will meet up with my friends soon.
i miss them like crazy!

and today choir sucks.
my sop was scolded by conductor.

to curious:
hahah. although i don't know who you are.
but i am not angry with you(:
hahah. i am not kind of person. yea.

i really don't know what to do.
how i wish all this didn't happen.
and i know that it's my fault for making things like that.

people. pls don't give up easily okay.
persevere on.
jia you(:

2009-02-14T14:08:00.002+08:00

i am really tired now.
ytd i went amk with lisa and jane,
and saw andrina and sir zm.
hahah. she was so shocked.

hazel gave me a sunflower. :D

seriously speaking.
this few days did happened a lot of things,
too much for me to hold.

i have no idea how to face you.
not that i am angry, but
it just happened ytd.
i can't forget it so easily.
i don't know if we can go back to where we were bestfriends,
less to say friends.
i am really sorry if i have hurt you in a way or another.
i just don't know why it happened..on friendship day.

i am going to meet zena later to buy presents for people(:
hahah. the mickey mouse that laura bought was super cute,
made me so jealous.

a happy valentine's day to all.

2009-02-07T15:18:00.002+08:00

ytd performance was nice. yays:D
i had to redo the dnt filing thingy, as in redo the work.
damn sad lah, redo leh.

and i want to really thank:
-lawrence
-felicia
-kenneth
-my good friend(tm)
and a lot other people for your concerns.

i am not going to give up anymore.
cause i have learnt to persevere(:

everybody seems to be sick this few days.
and that includes me. i am better now(:
i am going to cheong secondary three(:
no slacking yo. jia yous.

things are getting better and better.
worries and getting lesser and lesser.
hooray(:

2009-02-01T17:36:00.002+08:00

thanks felicia for your encouragement(:
and suen too.

i don't know why must you be a hyprocrite.
she forgave you, but you backstabbed her again.
i was stupid enough, thinking that you would change.
i was so wrong. for many years of friendship, i am really
disappointed in you.

i was really pissed for the past two days.
friday:
sec one was so unreasonable.
sitting on other ppl's seat. when i have to go and find my bag.

saturday:
mother asked me why ytd so late come back.
i said cause i had choir.
she said:" yea choir, you comfirm go suck up to your leaders right?
do you fit to be one leader? you are not, at least your brother took double science
, you take combined science. so he can be leader.
i replied: " yes, i am stupid, your son is clever. satsified with my answer?"
she practically hit me many times, and i pushed her. she slapped me.
i said: " so what if you are my mother, you don't have the right to hit ppl without
any fking reason. be reasonable. i am not your dog to let you hit and scold.
i have enough of you.

i was crying cause my mother was humilitating me.
to her, i am just a useless kid, wasting her money to let me learn paino.
she said i wasted two years of her money, not taking theory.
i replid:" you think very easy ah? i am trying my best already. "

i don't know why but my parents seem to be unreasonble and bais to my bro.
and bro, i hate you. i hate you for bullying me. just because i am younger than you
doesn't mean that you can hit and scold me. you suck.

when it comes to credit, everyone would be vying for it.
when it comes to blame, everyone just pushed the blame.
you are so hyprocrite. i hate you.

2009-01-24T14:32:00.002+08:00

i got problem for add maths!
it's rather difficult.
mr xiao already finished like 3 chapter?
then i missed maths tuition like for 1 month plus.
i was stuying maths just now.
there's quite a lot of question i don't know how to do.

ytd, i cheong to primary sch with peishan and puiyee to find
ms suhanna! no, i mean mdm suhanna!
hahah. we hugged her the minute we saw her.
i really missed her. three years already, but 6 grace'06 is loved(:
then dalen called me. it really scared me, cause he's voice super low.
i want to have 6 grace and 2 faith gathering(:
and i want many many of them(:

since last week, i have started to have lots of pressure.
the pressure is getting more and more, when i thought it would
get lesser.
the pressure that they are giving me is too unbearable.
i don't know how long i can hold.
i just need to how on a little bit longer.
two of the problems will be solved.

ytd played kite with hazel and miss quek at the art room behind.
i was really happy and did enjoyed myself ytd.
although i was really happy, but i know that i still got a lot of
problems, yet awaiting me to be solved.

i really want to thank those that are my listening ear.
those that really listened to what i said.
and thanks suen and becky for walking me home last thurseday.
and thanks for your hugs(:

sometimes, i just feel like giving up.
i am really sick and tired of all this problems.
i don't need___ to help me.
cause i know that___ that are close to me will eventually leave me.
don't even bother talking to me, cause i promised myself to ignore you.

sacrifising myself is nothing to you, right?

2009-01-17T18:14:00.001+08:00

i hate you.

2009-01-17T17:59:00.002+08:00

today had tuition tutored by neighbour ,phillip.
i saw melody!! hahah. so i sat beside her(:
he teach damn funy, cause very weird.
just very guai.

then had my green braces at cityhall there.
trained with mummy and korkor.
it was painful. but, i had to bear with it.
oh my gosh, i miss my mac'donalds..
next week will be CNY!
yea! looking forward for ang baos(:
hope i can eat goodies.

i just ended my paino. it's so tiring today.
tuition, braces and piano.
tmr will be paino, tuition, performance.
tmr will be combined breakfast, lunch and dinner.
breaklunchner(:

today i saw D.C at train. i was just standing beside her,
and she didn't realised that i am beside her.
hahah. i wanted to call her, but i can't t alk.
then saw sherilyn at basement.

whooo! CNY next week(: yeah:D

2009-01-15T17:42:00.003+08:00

today get back POA test.
results like shit, i failed. 6/22
this is the first time i failed maths.
so disappointed in myself. ):

tmr need to hand in chinese holiday hw.
but the chinese one i cannot type, no cd, no thumbdrive.
and i am lazy to do. cause my hand's wrist is painful.
this happened lots of time.

wah, today ouhsahgof damn kua zhang lor.
she teached the girls how to______.
i shall not say it.
tmr i wear no.1 tee, so i will be safe.
dots...sockes need to be worn above ankle.

today i was so stupid.
woke up at 5.45 , thinking that it was 6.45 so i rushed everything.
then my mother came and say i shen jing bing.
she say: " ni shen jing bing ah? xian zai cai wu dian dour er yi "
i looked at the clock and was stunned.

i am super hungry now cause i skipped my lunch.
i want to have a heavy dinner(:
my current height: 161.5 cm. weight: 50
omg! i am shrinking. dropped 4 cm...):
wa lao, those boys that i taller than them during primary sch,
now all taller than me liao. -.-

my current hair is super weird now.
i want to have a haircut.
i hate my hair now.
i think i going cut hair with lisa and zena(:

2009-01-14T22:21:00.002+08:00

Happy birthday to pui yee and kai xuan(:
your already 15 already wor..good for your, i still need to wait
like 10 months? i can't wait for my b'dae to come.
i felt like guilty because i never buy present for them. sorry.

i hate the ss teacher. sickening.
act only, say give us break, in the end never give break. liar lor.
she go super fast. today using two periods, my class finished
" learning " chapter 1. what the fish...she skipped like 15 pages??
she ask my class to copy, say give 1 minute, in the end like
give few seconds only. i only copied two line of the slide..):
super pissed off with her.

after school went to eat lunch with lisa, eileen and jane.
then went second floor locker there find hazel and tashka,
after awhile eileen and lisa came. eileen helped me with maths,
thank you(:

stayed with them after 7 then went back home.
and and i bought i no.1 tee and 1 skirt.
tmr got dnt untill 3.40. sian.
i now rushing through my work.
i wanted to ask my brother for help.
he say my chinese weird weird de, then he change for me..
then we sing songs, he want to prove that he know the lyrics
better than me..whatever.-.-
then what he help me half way, go his friend house do cake,
at first mummy don't allowm, then i bang ta jiang hao hua.
he can go finally. i help him lor(:

i don't know why i keep thinking this way.
he seems to be closer to you than me, it makes me think that you are stealing
him away from me. he is mine right from the beginning, yet you took him away.
at first i want him back, but after thinking, i think that i don't want him.
i don't need him. he seems to be bias to you.

well, you can have him.
i don't care about it anymore.
just don't hurt me anymore, i am feeling miserable,d i can't take it anymore.
i guess he doesn't know that i am avoiding him in that period of time. or maybe he does.
cause he doesn't care about me anymore.

maybe giving in to you will make my life easier.
from today onwards, i don't need him anymore.
i am going to be independent. i don't need him.
you know what?
after 3 years, i just realised that i am a fool, i am just an outsider.
i shouldn't even have...

i am just going to handle this on my own.

ytd had profecieny test. i think i border line past.
i think i won't get in.
if i didn't get in, i think i am going to cry on the spot.
i am so scared. ):

2009-01-08T20:06:00.002+08:00

hey people.
this few days, school is alright.
even me class in nice.
at first i don't really like my class,
but after a while, i really liked my class.

ytd dnt lesson, we are required to draw the grid thing.
and he said that it's the easiest, and that's normal acad work.
it's killing me.
laura helped me in question one and two. thank you(:

next tuesday got maths retest, what the freak, and it's only paper 1.
if i don't get more than 65, i will go into POA class.
i hate POA. it sucks.

just now afternoon after handing up dnt work, supposed to find hazel,
then she disappeared? hahah. no lah, she went for the orientation thing.
i waited at the carbana like from 2-2.30?
i messaged suen because nobody pei me eat lunch.
then after that she never reply, so i go find someone else.
after a while she called me, then i said sorry.

i looked through my contact list,
laura went out, hazel in orientation, jane and lisa in ms, trisha with her friends,
eileen and janelle got class, suen and becky not in.
so the only person that was available was fransiscus.
so i messaged him, and went to basketball court to find him.
then we wanted to drink bbt cause it's super hot!
as usual, i drank passionred no pearl.
wanted to pay money, but the auntie no change, so he paid for me.
afterthat, he went for his dental appointment,then i go back home.
thank you for the bbt and for pei-ing me today(:

physics and chemistry.
i am going to study hard(:
that's a promise to myself.
from today onwards, computer 2 weeks use 1 time.
study everyday.
i am going to get A for every subject, that's a promise to myself(:

tmr got performance and i haven't memorize lyrics yet,
i better memorize later(:
i am feeling super cold now.

they were mine,
but you took them away.
why did you have to do that?

2009-01-03T17:38:00.003+08:00

on thurseday, i went out with jill and hazel.
we drank bbt and ate chhese fries, and went NTUC and " pasimalam"
to buy stuffs. we went to the NTUC 3 times. -.-
i also took pictures of my new stationary and pencil case(:

changed the refiller(:
new ruler that i bought with hazel:D

new black pens! i love them<3

my new red, pooh pencilcase. i love the colour.

2009-01-03T13:50:00.002+08:00

so hows yesterday?
i believe that many sec 3 are not used to their class.
during recess, 2 faith'08 sat tgt at canteen,
i can see that they do miss each other.

i am so scared yesterday.
after performance, i went to find my class.
yvonne and hazel found their class, and went off.
and hazel said: '" love you. "
at that moment, i told myself to jia you.
that two words really comfort me, bestie. thank you(:

my form teacher is mr loo. i don't like him.
although he teaches POA, but he doesn't have to
talk about maths like for 1 period?
it's really waste time.
and there's a lot of people that i don't know.

my english teacher is miss cythia ng, she's nice(:
and my class is quiet during that lesson.
colour file for english is pink.

my maths teacher is mr xiao.
not really sure if he's my maths teacher because
my class combining with 3 joy, and will be split into 3 class.

bestie, i am waiting for my special post on your blog(:

this year, i should really study hard.
next year O level, no joke.
so, computer use lesser, study harder.
i want to have good results(:

jia you everyone.
work hard people(:

2008-12-29T17:21:00.002+08:00

today i went to dental to have me teeth extracted.
it was quite painful, especially the injection part.
the dentist and the 2 nurse was very patient with me.
the dentist waited for me to be ready for injection.
it's so pain till i cried.
the dentist said i was a brave girl(:
and he said lots of praising words, hear already so shuang.
today had 2 teeth extracted.

afterthat, i ate lunch with the 2 special friends.
they ate spicy noodle and i ate bland one.
tuition today is nice(:

now my teeth really painful.
i didn't eat the medicine because don't eat pills, i eat liquid
medicine. it would be so embarassing to ask for liquid medicine,
cause i am 14 already, still don't dare to eat pills. ):

putting braces on 10th january. :D

2008-12-27T18:10:00.001+08:00

i got to be strong.
i will not cry anymore.
jia yous(:

2008-12-27T16:51:00.004+08:00

a thank you to hazel(:
she helped me to do the template thing.
she always helped me to change blogskin, tagboard.
thank you nut!

for the holiday assignments, i have completed
-science
-maths
-english
chinese and geography i shall do it tonight.

just now when i went for piano lesson,
my teacher told me something, and really made me teared.
she said if i passed my grade 5 theory,
i can skip grade6 and straight away go to grade7.
she said i got the standard of grade 7.
i was really very happy to hear that.
she talking to me, like yay! hip hip hooray!
me, me, it's really me(: *teared*
i really hope that i can pass grade 5 theory next year.
jia yous(:

and there is something i want to post about before i end my post.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JANE(:
a very happy birthday to you. i owe you a present.
happy sweet 14th(:

2008-12-22T18:44:00.002+08:00

gosh, i forgot to borrow the chinese book from library.
i haven't completed a lot lot of assignments, got to do them soon.
you are right, i am retarded and stupid classmate like you said.
i didn't even blame you can.
all you said is ''go and review your blog''.
i also never blame you with all my mood swing thoughts.
even if i did. i am sorry. i bet you are still angry.

tonight i am not going to sleep.
i am going to complete holiday assignments.

2008-12-20T12:08:00.002+08:00

ytd had bbq at kennneth's house.
something happened, and it made me really sad about it,
worse still, made me teared.
after a while, my mood was back.
a really thank you to you guys ytd for comforting me.
it's not his fault for telling me, so you don't have to be sorry.___
i have faith and trust in you, and believe that you wouldn't tell
anyone about it.

maybe be (she) betrayed me or (he) go around telling people who i like.
i know he hated me very much. nomatter it is interclass for vertical
challenge, road relay, skipping and during the practise,
he always blamed me. and it's always the team members fault, not his.
i's like, come on. we are a class, we should be united and not blaming
another person right?

he must be glad that i cried ytd.
congragulations, you have attained your goal.
nomatter who betrayed me,
nomatter who told ________ about my blog,
i don't care anymore,
cause i really had enough of your nonsense.
the thing that i worry most, happened.
my first crush was known to the person, now also is going to be known.
there is only one conclusion, i was a fool to trust them.
even if he knows that i like him now, so be it.

you want to tell the whole class about my blog, go on, i will not stop you.
even if you want to tell the whole world, i also not going to care.

are you shamed of yourself, i guess not.
a person like you will never know the meaning of hurt.

i am your classmate, i just didn't expect you to be so mean to me.

2008-12-19T13:38:00.002+08:00

doreen: you are linked(:
simin: hey :D
denise: i will, and you are linked. :P
PUI YEE: i hope so.
hazel: don't cry, cause if you do, i will cry even more.
laura: i will, thanks(:
Jane: i am not starving myself. just no appetite. don't worry(:
trishaa: hey hey!
rachel: ya thanks, i believe i will find friends.
Suen: suensuensuen daughter hello(:
Becky: yea, i saw you. sorry couldn't send you the songs ytd.
hazel: i am back tooo(:

thank you people for encouraging me and comforting me.
don't worry, i am fine(:
and those going for BBQ later, see you.
11 more days and it will be school day, how time flies.
thanks yvonne for buying my lunch ytd(:
ytd performance was great, i did enjoy myself as i was singing.

i will post again soon.
byebye, and take care people.

2008-12-12T19:18:00.002+08:00

i came back from japan yesterday midnight and i slept at 3.30.
the tour was alright i guess.

i keep telling myself to stop thinking about it.
mummy, you don't have to scold me stupid right?
you everytime scold me, even if i never did wrong,
i also appologised. and you told dad and brother about it.
it really hurt me.

during the tour, you told one of the parent that brother was much more
sensible than me. and dad spoiled me.
what a lie you said to not let your son lose face.
i know myself that i did my part as a daughter,
even if brother bully me..i kept quiet and pretend nothing happen.

yesterday he spilled the sauce on the table,
and brother blamed me for spilling.
fine, i took the blame, but still i had to clear the mess.
mummy, i don't know why you are treating me like that.
isit because my piano grades made you lose face?
isit because i am not a guy?
isit because brother studies grade is better than mine?
i guess so.

nomatter what i do, i can't satisfact you right?
it's forever like that. nothing is going to change.
it's forever my fault.
i am going to tolerate.

everytime you scold me, it really hurt me.
you will never know the pain i am going through.
everytime when brother bullies me, when mummy and dad scold me,
there is no one i can go to.
no one to lean on the shoulder's and cry out loud.
i can only pray to god.

oh lord, help me.

2008-11-29T21:32:00.002+08:00

this are the lyrics for the song on my blog.

终於我明白
你的感受
看深爱的人远走
比全面失去
好过一些
记忆永远会留着

我能做的事情一件也没有了
请别说破最后一道沉默
无法接受夏天一放手就坠落
破碎的冰河往悲伤缓慢的漂流
说分手就分手你一定是在骗我
好让我一夜看透
失去你我算什麽
好难过别捉弄还想陪你到尽头
谁需要什麽自由我的世界早被你垄断占有
oh~oh~

哭也找不到坚持理由
这是我最难过的比全面失去心痛一些记忆永远会留着

我能做的事情一件也没有了
请别说破最后一道沉默
无法接受夏天一放手就坠落
破碎的冰河往悲伤缓慢的漂流
说分手就分手你一定是在骗我
好让我一夜看透
失去你我算什麽
好难过别捉弄还想陪你到尽头
谁需要什麽自由我的世界早被你垄断占有
oh~oh~

i think the lyrics are quite meaningful.
dinner tonight? no thanks.
no dinner for me(:

2008-11-29T19:49:00.003+08:00

laimin, even if you are a loner, so be it.
you are destined to be one.
but maybe you will find a bestie soon?

i am really scared.
scared that i will be alone.
well, i just can't imagine what will be laimin next year.
like laimin in primary six?

dear lord,
i really need the courage and comfort.
i am really scared...
it's as if i am lost in the darkness, i can't see anything.
i need your hands to hold me through the next two years.

now 2 faith is like over.
i really miss you guys, can we meet up? *tears dripping*

i use to be dependent on my besties.
but now, i have to be dependent on myself.
from today onwards, i will learn not to be dependent on my friends.
i will be prepared.

i believe next year will really be a brand new year for me.
new friends, everything new.
and laura is going to be the same class as me next year.
i really hope i can be best friend with her.

2008-11-29T19:00:00.003+08:00

what the fuck?
i different class from ALL my cliques next year.
i bet that i will be a loner in 3 love.

gosh, i just feel like crying.
what if the same thing happen to me when
i am in primary five and six.
at least jane they all together,
hazel still got eileen and yvonne.
i got none.
i am just going to be a loner next year. ):
* tears dripping now*

fransiscus come back quick.
i really need your comfort.

2008-11-27T21:39:00.003+08:00

today i spent my day meaninglessly, getting bored.
i went for piano from 2-3.30pm.
it's super tiring. even my hands are aching!
next monday i got date with jane, hazel and trisha.
they are going to pei me cut hair.

my mother scolded me for being sick,
cause i got flu and cough, and going overseas in one week time.
Laimin! get well!

2008-11-25T15:06:00.003+08:00

to hazel:
i know that you are worried over your grandad.
but, be strong, don't worry.
history WON'T repeat itself.
jia you, i will be there for you nomatter what.

just reading hazel's and jill's blog, made me teared.

i just felt so useless that i can't do anything do help them.

2008-11-25T14:12:00.002+08:00

this is what happened on last friday, 20th nov.

i was really happy on that day, thanks peepos(:
i went out with hazel, jane, lisa, eileen, jit fen and gerry.
we met at 10 at ntuc basement, and started buying foods.
we bought, bread, tuna, chips and drinks, plates,
and used bowls as cups, so cool! i feel so ancient!

then eileen came and gave me birthday present.
thanks rachel, eileen, jane and lisa(:
i was really touched by the box of chocolates and shampoo.

i was quite shocked that they knew the chocolate shop that i adore.
cause everytime when hazel and me go j8, i will buy chocolates from
that usual shop. we would usually eat double chocolate.
that's our favourite(:
and that passion shampoo, i am like finding that like crazy.
and they bought it for me(:

and i was frightened(had a heart attack) by gerry!
cause he dropped the 7-up bottle drink on the floor a lot of time,
when i opened it, the syrup flow out!
i was like ahhhhh....
what a birthday gift from you, gerry. -.-

and they bought cake for me.
the girls put choclate on my face here and there.
and we went to the beach to play like crazy.
and jane is a great photographer(:

after everything has ended,
lisa, jane, eileen and jit fen went orchard for dinner i think,
then hazel, me and gerry take cab home.
we alighted at j8, mrt opposite,
then bid goodbye.

it was really a fun day with you guys.
thanks for everything(:
and thanks lisa for bringing that 'present' for me(:
i love you guys forever<3.

2008-11-19T10:47:00.002+08:00

你到低要伤害我到什麼时候?
我知道他们疼你，多果疼我。
但你也不需要在我的面前一直说。
你的动作已经伤害到我。

我不知道当初，为什么要和你做朋友。

2008-11-14T19:16:00.002+08:00

brother, i miss you like thousands.
life without you is weird,
when we laugh during tv shows and quarrel.
ah..anyway you will be back tmr(:
no b'dae cake for me todayyyy,
although i had one few days back.

today jeslyn tease me.
say dunno who ah, purple choir tee, today b'dae ah,
don't act ah. it's so funny(:

today i slept for 2 hours.
i still feel like sleeping.
i am going to wath princess hours and find job(:

tonight don't sleep(:
i think i should buy myself something.
'cong cong wo zi ji'
hahah.
laimin is going to make the powerpoint thing.
i swear it will turn out like shit.
but, i will try(:

2008-11-14T18:30:00.002+08:00

today is my b'dae(:
thanks choir for singing the b'dae song(:

a reply to hazel's blog/post:
actually today morning i was also quite pissed with my
neighbour, and was not in right mood.
not in the right mood means that today sucks forever and
i might show angry face, worst still i think i scolded you,
sorry.

my dumbdumb neighbour never dry the clothes then
drip into my clothes! what the hell..i give them a lot of
chance lor, then they take for granted.
but it's okay, eileen says i am kind, so i will forgive them(:
it's like WTH, today my b'dae then wet my clothes.
THEY RUINED MY DAY!!

anyway, it's okay.
don't think about it.
we are still best friends afterall.
it's not my fault and not yours.
so it's NOBODY's fault.

2008-11-13T18:28:00.002+08:00

today i went out with jane, lisa, eileen, rachel and janelle.
it was fun, i enjoy going out with them.

i feel quite moody now, i also don't know why.
tmr is my b'dae and i don't feel happy.
i just feel that you are stealing things away from me.

2008-11-10T15:48:00.002+08:00

hello(: back from class chalet.
it was quite fun.
everybody seems so tired, want to sleep.
it's a pity that there's not much picture taken,
but it's okay, the memories will always be in my mind.

i am in trisha's house now.
supposed to do homework, but i will do later.
sian leh, tmr still got choir, need to wake up early.
anyway, that's all.

the chalet was indeed nice(:

2008-11-05T20:49:00.002+08:00

i went to school at 7.30am with hazel.
it's so cool! it makes me feel as is was a school day(:
anyway, choir was nice(:
yay! i like the song 'white horses'.
i will feel accomplished after learning the song.

soprano one seems to be the hardest part to learn,
so jia you soprano one(: laimin will be cheering for your!
hahah. today was a great day.

after choir, had lunch with hazel and victoria.
we ate lunch at the market.
me and hazel got stuck there, cause we had no umbrellas!
then we went to the 'workout place' to chit-chat.
it's long since i chated with her(:
i went to her house for a 1 hour and left to home.

i had pizza for dinner(: it was yummy!
sorry kok chye for waiting for me.
i was late for ten minutes i guess.
today is quite a memorable day(:

2 faith is seperated.
although i am sad, but to think about it,
god has plan for us.
nomatter what class we are going next year,
our friendship never changes(:

well, tomorrow is the skipping competition.
my stomache is like hurting me, feel like eating
2 pills instead of 1.
i am in the same condition as hazel, stomache.
we got weak stomache.
what if i ruin the whole thing tmr?
i am not afriad of losing.
why think so much about it?
just have fun and try your best(:
there's no use thinking about it.

god, pls grant me the strength and courage for the competition.
amen.

2008-10-30T17:53:00.002+08:00

here to blog again for the second time today.
i read through hazel's blog.
it made me think of samantha's grandmother and my cousin.

i shall do the quiz from hazel and hannah(:

1. hazel
2. suen
3. jane
4. trisha
5. eileen
6. yvonne
7. doreen
8. sarah
9. rachel
10. bryankry
11. constance(cousin)
12. constiie(friend)
13. drina
14. jill
15. yankang
16. iris
17. yun zhen
18. yu pin
19. chong loon
20. dahlia

How did you meet #4?
- I met her in primary school(:

What would you do if you never meet #1?
- i will not be as happy(:

What if #9 and #20 date?
- they would never cause they are not lesbian for god's sake.
-they might if they are opposite sex.

Will #6 and #17 date?
- they don't know each other.

Describe #3?
- she's crappy and she loves to read english storybooks(:

Is #8 attractive?
- yes, she is. she is also kind(:

Describe #7
- she likes that HSM3 song(:

Do you know any of #12 family members ?
- yes, i know.
- her sister is super adorable(:

#18 confess that she likes me?
- she will never.

Would you ever date #1?
- maybe if she is a guy(:

Is #19 single?
- i don't know.
-maybe he is attached(:

What languages do #15 speaks?
-english and chinese(:

Who goes out with #9 normally?
- lisa, me, janelle, and others(:

How old is #16?
- she's 14 this year(:

#2 favourtie singer?
- jonas brothers i think(:

Would u ever date #4?
- maybe i will if she's a guy(:

What is #10 last name?
- yang(:

Would you ever be in a relationship with #11?
-nope. she's a female and my cousin(:

What is #3 school?
- kcpss(:

Where does #6 lives?
-amk i think(:

What's your favourite things about #5?
- she is considerate and care for others(:
- she is kind(:
- she says that laimin is very kind(:

Seen #2 naked before?
- nope. i am not sicko!(:

tag 5 ppl to do this quiz
#1 hazel
#2 suen
#3 jane
#4 eileen
#5 trisha

happy doing this quiz though(:

2008-10-30T09:37:00.003+08:00

ahhhhhh! shit!
today i am the only girl for skipping!
i am still deciding whether i should go or not.
later going out with dahlia to buy fbt.
suen! i will go out with you soon(:

stop it. why? what's wrong being zi hao's sister.
stop saying that. it's also none of your business right.
i skipping then you go say. asshole lah,
you are spoiling my mood,I HATE YOU!
next time you say again, i scold again.
i just hate people calling me zi hao's sister.
how i wish i am not in the same school as him.

i got muscleache, backache.
later need to eat medicine to 'fang song' my stomach.
medicine, i love the medicine, cause it's green colour(:

pls anyone, is free later to accompany me when skipping.
i mean girls, i don't want to be so awkard.

2008-10-28T17:20:00.002+08:00

i had choir and skipping today, and this is going to
continue for the next few days.
i hurt my middle finger today, i feel dumbdumb.
anyway i started to have muscleache today,
i don't know how long can i hold.

tmr i am going to meet doreen at 7 am ,isin't it so cool?
hahah. we are going to have mac for breakfast(:
and my hand feels so numb now, yvonne knows why.

today i am quite disappointed and upset over the matter.
i told myself reasons why she did not come, cause she's not
those kind of person that would lie.
maybe i misunderstood her, i hope so.
nomatter what, i will trust her.

2008-10-23T20:15:00.003+08:00

hey people!
i am here to revive my dead blog(:
i didn't get the combination i wanted.
so i am going to appeal.

today is the last day of school and i cried two times.
first time is at hall when mrs grace tham said about ms cheok.
second time is at classroom.
two years have passed so quickly, time to bid farewell to my class.

i really can't bear to seperate with my friends, my cliques,
studying group, seeing them play basketball.
thank you, two faith for bringing much joy to me.
i enoyed spending my two years with you guys.
so here are some messages for my friends.

hazel:
thanks for being there for me when i needed help,
my studies and everything, mugging with me.
you are like my er jie jie(:

trisha:
you improved in your results(:
you always care about your friends,
you are a nice person(:

jane:
green panter or should i call you donkey.
hahah. okay don't tease you liao.
you are always the one to bond the class together,
always the one with laughter and jokes.

suen:
daugter! hahah, i am not dumbdumb!
we always think about jokes anywhere, anytime.
i will miss your laughter.
benben will always remember shasha(:

eileen:
you taught me japanese(:
the first word, daijoubu!
hahah, you are always considerate.
aishiteru(:

lisa:
i found a best friend this year, name called lisa
and that's you(:
very glad to celebrate your b'dae with you.
hahah. your pink rabbit is gone):
it's okay, i will buy you rabbit sweet(:
pink rabbit will always be my best friend(:

grace:
it all started with skipping,that i got to know you better.
thanks for the encouragement when i scored badly
for my exams.
you will always be my skipping partner(:

gerry:
you and your pizza land, pasta land.
omg, first time i see a guy so inside eating.
hahah. byes(:

kenneth:
geography partner!
don't emo lehs, i scared.
thanks for helping in my gepgraphy.

leon:
studying club!
hahah. i will miss studying with you.

jit fen:
you ah...don't act cool leh.
always say yourself is ben shao yeh.
hahah. byes(:

2008-10-19T12:21:00.003+08:00

it's the fifth day.
worst still, i vomited.
6 more days going to the doctor.
what's wrong with my stomach?

today practically moody the whole day.
i also don't know why.
not in the mood to do anything.
for those people that i have showed attitude,
i am sorry, i didn't mean to.
i just can't control myself.

2008-10-18T18:29:00.003+08:00

today stomache again!!
it's like four days already, the pain is so pain.
supposed to meet suen today but cause of stomache
can't go out. sorry suen.

7 more days, i am going to dental.
and going to check my stomache.
why? why must it be me?
out of everybody why must it be me?
the girl that have stomache everyday.
sometimes when i can't stand the pain, i cry.
if i got the (mang cang yan) i need to go operation,
i am really very scared.
no use thinking about it, i can't do anything.

2008-10-10T10:00:00.004+08:00

my reply to hazel's blog:
hahah. you are welcome(:
yay! like going that place and p.s soon.

i am really like damn angry.
don't think you are my brother you can bully me.
eat already never wash your plates and utensils.
shout at me. yesterday i suppose to use com,
you purposely sleep don't let me use.
do you know you are too much sometimes.

it's just that when you are sleeping mummy and father
told me secretly to give in to you.
i promised them, i will give in.

i will never break the promise.

2008-09-15T12:49:00.002+08:00

okay, samantha's grandamother is gone.
actually intended to visit her during mooncake
festival, but she passed away already.
yesterday was the burning of the body.
i heard that a lot of people cry when the music
and the coffin is pushed in.

i didn't went.
cause i know i can't control my emotions.
it will take me some time to get over it.
i learnt that you will cherish something only
when the thing is gone.
i finally know to cherish things after this incident

recently, i was blamed by almost half of the girls in my class.
i was saddened. it's like what have i done wrong?
can't they listen to what i say?
when things happen, it's my fault, it's always my fault.
they don't even have the trust in me?
then how the hell do we communicate?

parents blaming me for what i have done.
not my brother's fault.
yesterday i was supposedly asked to call my brother to come back home.
he scolded my saying don'tisturb lah.
i hanged the phone and said:
if not mummy ask me to call you, i don't even want to call you.

i just don't know what's wrong with me.
i really had enough of the nonsense.
what is your fucking problems?

2008-09-04T15:06:00.003+08:00

went to meet jit fen at bastketball court
at 7:30am.
then at 8 plus, gerry and kok chye came.
it was okay, although i am the only girl.

hey, let me tell you a good news.
i have taken out the code from my phone.
from now onwards, you can read the message as you like.
i don't care. cause you have no intergrity.
trying to act innocent?
oh come one..it's no asif i don't know right.

oh, don't act innocent.
always read my messages.
let me have some privacy.
i talk to you, you ignore me.
so what you have the authority.
have some shame.
now, you can easily read my messages.
congragulations.

i really hate you.
i don't know why the hell i had a friend like you.
fuck off.

2008-09-02T23:04:00.002+08:00

is it you?

I'm looking for a lover not a friend.
Somebody who can be there when I need someone to talk to.
I'm looking for someone who won't pretend.
Somebody not afraid to say the way they feel about you.

And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel,
keep me real and who knows always.
The way I like to have you in my way.
And I'm looking for someone who takes me there,
Wants to share, shows he cares.
Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for.

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for
Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need?

I'm looking for someone to share my pain
Someone who I can run to, who would stay with me when it rains.
Someone who I can cry with through the night.
Someone who I can trust who's heart is right.
And I'm looking for someone.

And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel,
keep me real and who knows always.
The way I like to have you in my way,
And I'm looking for someone who takes me there,
Want to share, shows he cares.
Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for.

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for.
Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for.
Could you be the one for me? Could you be this one I need?

Take for grant,How much I care.
And appreciates that I'm there.
Someone who listens,
and someone I can call who isn't afraid of thought to share.

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for.
Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need?

Is it you? is it you?
Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for.
Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need?

2008-09-02T16:30:00.005+08:00

today had choir.
hahah. i decided that i should take
size, xs for choir tee.
had lunch with choir friends and 'siduobilly'

hahah. i a not going to tell you who is that.
it's a SECRET!
hahah. that joke made me laugh for like so long.

everyone has family problems.
that includes me.
it can actually change a person.
change a person totally.
that's kind of scary.

i always have to tell myself to endure.
orelse..something might happen.
i just have to bear with your nonsense.
if scolding me will make you feel better,
then scold all you want.

2008-08-30T21:48:00.002+08:00

it's never your fault.
it's always my fault.
don't want to admit your mistake?
if you don't wake up,
you are going to make more mistakes in the future.

i am quite moody this few days.
i don't know what got over me.
anyway, i am going to find ways to do things.
orelse i am going to like bored.

i rmbed hazel asked me what is my last wish
before i die,
my answer is, i want to see my cousin.

so what is your answer?
championship?

anyway, i got third for road relay.
(iris, me, david, prenesh)
i did my best, so no regrets(:

from today onwards, need to study hard to achieve
good results for EOY.
i want to get A for everything.
but actions speak louder than words.
so need to work hard.

i am not going to care about you anymore.
cause it doesn't concern me.
it's doesn't matter to me now.

2008-08-28T21:24:00.002+08:00

my results:
chinese-27.5/47
langsart-17/25
science-26/52
maths-34/50
geography-34.5/50

all passed and some improved[:

today got vertical challenge.
the girls won.
( jane, me, trisha and iris)
hahah. i am happy.

tmr, there is skipping performance
and road relay.

my leg is seriously very pain.
i don't know if i can run tmr.
what if i let down the class?
i don't know..
people are like:
wah, laimin you can run meh.

let me tell you.
it's not the problem whether can run or not.
nobody wanted to go, so i went.
i admit that i can't run fast,
but at least i will try my best right?
just stop it.
it's irritating.
i already don't care about the pain in my leg,
what more you want me to do?
run in 1 second?

i am really scared,
scared about road relay,
scared i ruin up the race.

i am not going to care if i lose,
cause i know i have tried my best.

2008-08-24T10:33:00.003+08:00

yesterday was like running staircase and
running in stadium.
hahah. hope can improve my stamina.
actually supposed to go for skipping,
but then it was cancelled.
but i still going out to meet my friends(:

oh my gosh.
laimin is like going to cheong study everyday
starting from tomorrow(:
i hope to get A for every subject for EOY.
hahah. i hope leon, kenneth and hazel
wouldn't fall sick cause they ran with me
in the stadium in the rain.

next week would be a tiring with lots of activities.
i am sure i will enjoy it.

well, i am not sure why you did that,
to hurt my best friend.
i am sure you are guilty.
it's okay to make mistakes
but it's not okay to not admit your mistake.

my handphone hang..and hang..and hang!
i am so pissed! you suck!:D

my geo partner win me almost all subjects..
ahhh..i want to win him during EOY!
hahah.

my results:
chinese-27.5/47
langarts-17/25
science-26/50

my chinese is like
FREAKING, FREAKING, FREAKING, LOW!
what the fish..
i got like so low.

i am not blaming the teacher,
i just want to go back to mr ng's class.
my sec one results suck.
he is the teacher that pulled up my results.
now changed teacher, my result dropped again.
i really want to go back to mr ng's class.

your expctations are just too high.
you want to learn everything.
are you like crazy?
it's tired being friends with you.
the pressure..you 'll never understand.

okay, burbye:P

2008-08-13T18:29:00.002+08:00

i am quite disappointed actually,
but it's alright.
i always tell myself:
it's okay.
god cherish and loves you.

i have also started to look at things on the
bright side. i hope it does works for me.
that's the only solution.

just leave me alone.
that's my problem, not yours.
i know you are trying to help,
but i think it's best that you don't care about me.
cause, i don't want to add on to your burden.
i know your kind intentions.
but, i will handle things myself.
don't worry about me, i will be fine.
and thanks for being there when i needed the comfort.

2008-08-09T13:10:00.002+08:00

okay, i am like sick now.
luckily there's no piano lesson today.

i was told to buy lunch for my mother.
and she scolded me for buying her the wrong food.

i am sick, yet i still went to buy lunch for her.
and was scolded.
i was really angry.
everytime when me and my brother are told to
buy food for my mother.
nobody dared to buy for her.
cause we will get scolded in the end.

to my mother:
it's not that i don't want to respect you,
it's just that if you want people to respect you,
you ought to respect people first.
YOU ARE ALWAYS SO SELFISH.
YOU ALWAYS BLAME ME.
i really want to talk back to you.
and i know that you will use a cane to settle.

well, i really had enough of you.
i don't know how long can i hold on in this family.
with everyone biased to my brother,
with my mother treating me like that.
i feel as if i am not loved.

2008-08-02T17:19:00.002+08:00

i know you treat me like a stranger.
but what can i do?
cry? say that it's all my fault?
it's of no use.

you changed to a different person.
you are not yourself.
i know that you betrayed me.
you think i don't know?

well, maybe i was too naive to believe and trusted what you said.
i am a fool.

2008-07-19T11:10:00.002+08:00

i am very disappointed in you.

2008-07-16T21:45:00.002+08:00

everytime i see you,
i can't control myself.
i have the feeling of running away.

yes, seeing you with her makes me feel
uneasy. but i think it's time for me to let go.
i really cannot take it anymore.
it really irritates me..
i feel akward looking at you.

you don't understand.
well, i don't expect you to understand me.
i just hope you will be happy.
that's all i want.
i don't expect much.

of course, it hurts in my heart.
i will let time heal the pain.
i hope my friends don't give those kind of
reactions like..
eh..daddy 1, daddy 2.

cause i hate it.
they are not anymore, never going to.

2008-07-16T21:22:00.002+08:00

today was a quite nice day indeed.
after school went to computer lab to do LA project.
then went to eat then study with hazel, ying ying
and tashka.
test coming soon.
need to study[:

i suddenly thought of my cousin during chinese
class. i almost cried.
i thought of the car accident, everything.
it's so saddening.
like what hazel said,
if i witnessed the accident, i wouldn't talk.

oh gosh, i can't even remember how he look like.
but then..i miss him.
when he passed away..i was like only primary one.
okay..tears dripping down on my face.

okay, i shouldn't think about it anymore.

2008-07-13T15:30:00.002+08:00

today was quite alright..just a bit bored.
had performance in the morning.
was okay i think.

hahah. then went home to change and then
met doreen, jia ning and dahlia for lunch.
actually planned to play basketball.
but then..don't have the ball.
so we went arcade instead.

home now.
brother watching show with his friends later,
so i am using the computer now(:

homework to do later(:
okay..burbye(:

2008-07-12T18:55:00.002+08:00

hazel, i am updating(:
i am starting to blog(:
hahah. i was quite happy.
cause i did the tests by myself.
first time get so high for goegraphy and science.

i didn't expect myself to get 24/30 for science.
thinking about it, i somehow feel like crying.
too touched by my efforts(:
and geography, i actually get 8/10.
hahah. unexpected also.
cause the day before, i got cramps and studied a bit only.

hahah. maths test coming soon.
i am confident that i will get A1.
i will work hard for it(:

i made a deal with mugging partner.
if any of us get A for science,
then the other person will treat bbt.
this time round, is we both treating each other(:

there is performance tmr.
sherilyn is conducting(:
sherilyn, jia you(:

yesterday i guess i got gastric bah.
during singing, i wasn't feeling quite well.
stomache was like...and feel like vomiting.
now, i understands how hazel feels when this
happens to her.

must eat healthy and grow happily.
no stress, only happiness(:
i won't think i am fat, wanting to lose weight.
i won't think about unhappy stuffs.
i am happy(:

hahah. today is a great day.
i believe tmr will be even better(:

if you ask me who i like, daddy 1 or daddy 2.
my answer will be:
it doesn't matter now.
cause i know it's impossible,
when one is attached, and the other one
is like so FAR from me.
i love nobody.

2008-07-05T18:26:00.002+08:00

i am freaking bored..
what to do?? can't go out.
yesterday's performance is great.
it's like nice can.
i was the first to walk in and the last to walk out.
i was freaking scared.

i am quite upset now.
thinking of what she said.
i was really quite disappointed.

i trusted her so much,
yet she still betrayed me.
have i done wrong to her??
i thought that she was a nice person.
in the end..it turned out to be like that.
just what's her fucking problem?

i just hate the feeling of being betrayed.
it's terrible. it's freaky. it's saddening.

i can't blame her for being like that.
it's not her fault actually.
it's actually..
my fault for trusting her.
my fault for knowing her.
it's all my fault.

why are tears dripping down my face now?

i don't know why it turned out to be like that.
maybe she will feel good hurting me i guess.
problems, problems, problems.
i have been through this so many times
already, i will make it through also this time.

laimin, you will make it through.

2008-07-03T19:17:00.000+08:00

thanks to hazel i can blog now(:
yeahs.
just now came back from school at
second floor locker. was playing all while.

saw something, as expected.
they was together.
i was kind of disappointed.

seowlaimin.
you must accept the fact that they are together.
let go, there is no use clinging on those things.
instead..you should give them your blessings.
i told myself not to love him anymore.
but it hurts to see them together.
it's bitter i know.

nevermind.
sooner or later, i am forget about him.
i believe that as time passes,
the hurt in me will all gone.
all gone...all gone.
it's going to be over soon.

2008-07-02T16:40:00.002+08:00

BOO, HAZEL HERE :)

Done, you can post now. Hehheh
&& please post. Bleh. :P
You are at my house now with the MAMA JANE clique.
Hehheh. & we are enjoying ourselves very much.

YOURStruly; nutt-

2008-06-24T21:32:00.000+08:00

today was nice(:
anyway, changed a lot of teachers.
as expected lah..

today's choir was like,
okay lor. i sing off-tune for three notes.
cause i was not paying attention!
hahah. there will be performances,
all those, althought it will be tiring,
but it will be fun and nice(:

after victoria told me about that.
i was happy..i should say i am pretty
relieved and shock at the same time.

okay,got to go.
burbye. see you guys in school tmr(:

2008-06-20T22:18:00.000+08:00

okay, blogger got problem.
anyway, today was a nice day indeed.
hahah. can't stop laughing(:

sometimes, i stop and think,
i am drifting from that twin soul.
no more letter writing,
no more sms-ing,
no more talking in msn,
no more jokes,
nothing.
hazel knows who is that twin soul.

anyway, i am finding score sheet.
i took 30 mins and i find none!
i am so angry..but at the same time laughing.
okay, jiayou jiayou jiayou(:

2008-06-20T03:15:00.000+08:00

i like pig lah.
slept from 2am-11:30am.
it's so unbelieveable,
cause this is the first time.

hahah.
okay, i wil post the pictures now.
actually there are more,
but miss hazel didn't bring her camera.

sour cream and onion (auntie annes)

my zi-lian at hazel house(:

2008-06-19T14:45:00.000+08:00

whooohoooo!
today is so wow.
went to meet hazel to plaza sing.
many things happened.

then...
okay, more information is at
hazel's blog. hahah. i am too lazy to type.
then we studied.
we= me, hazel, stiie and jill
hahah. finally can study with stiie(:

hahah. super funny.
had fun(:
then dinner-ed at hazel house also.
i felt ps cause..
small quarrel between her father and her.

today was a great day.
fun and laughter all around(:
no greif no nothing.

school are going to re-open soon.
homeworks to be done!
hahah. jia you(:
okay, got to rest.
burybye.

2008-06-18T10:30:00.000+08:00

i slept at 2:30am today.
how cool isit?
studying in my mother's room.

went to hazel house to do holiday assignments.
it was fun.
oh yes..i rembered the quiz that i did.
it was two guys that i love/loves/loved.
very hard to decide to choose who now.

my arm is hurting.
i don't know why.
i just know it hurts..
i want to know the reason it hurts,
it's really quite painful.
i just hate the feeling of it.

how does it feels,
when you are closer to a friend,
(a friend you met in friendster)
than your stead.
it's sort of weird..don't you think so.

okay..i just heard a news.
i am shock.
i am scared.
i am freak out.
SOMEONE HELP ME!

2008-06-15T06:09:00.000+08:00

i love the show:
tian wang si shen ji
it's so cool lah. hahah.
anyway, tmr father's day.
what to buy ah...?
i haven't think of yet.

hahah. tmr then say bah.
today very sian sia.
nothing to do.
bored to death!

i got nothing to do so...

zi-lian time!

i love myself(:

2008-06-14T14:45:00.000+08:00

oh ya..thinking about what happened.
i accompanied hazel to cut her hair.
her mother came too.
she reborned then cut then cut side frindge.
she looks nice(:

it took about 5 hours. hahah.
then we ate lunch together,
and i took some pictures.

a note for me at the receipt.

she is camera shy.

yay! she finally let me take pic.

don't worry..you hair is fine(:

pic taken while waiting for train.

zi-lian<33

zi-lian again<33

2008-06-13T10:00:00.000+08:00

i am back studying at hazel house.
laughing is contagious man.
once hazel laugh, i laugh.
once i laugh, hazel laugh.
once started laughing, can't stop.

just now hazel is like,
laimin i going australia next week for
maths competition.
i was like fooled by her for so long.

okays, finally found my geography paper
after few mintues of finding my worksheets.
hahah. i am so glad that it's not lost.

oh ya, this morning i got cramps.
it was so pain that i cry.
it's horrible man.
i was like tossing and turning on the bed.
at that time, i was like freak out.
hahah. but i didn't regret drinking
the cups of cold water.

2008-06-11T03:46:00.000+08:00

thanks for concern everyone(:
i will cheer up somehow.
nomatter how sad i am,
i know that god loves me(:

i am cutting hair in two hours time.
watching concert in eight hours time.
godfather coming..
soon i think.

today is a good day.
i love today.
today had brought me much joy
and happiness(:

2008-06-10T12:22:00.000+08:00

hahah. just back from tuition.
it was about the cockcroach.
it's like my friend ran from the classroom
to outside and stand on the table.

hahah. it was so funny man.
the teacher said that it's warm up(:
this tuition is fun because of the
jokers and friends.
i love them(:

i am cutting hair tmr.
can you believe it..??
seowlaimin cutting hair(:
hahah. i am looking forward tooooo.

god-father staying over at my house tmr.
yeah. that's so so so great(: